Feminine Protection, Continued....

OK...Scruff here...this is really much ado about nuthin'....I mean maybe I didn't eat that "thing"....or maybe I did...not tellin'....

All I know is if I do it again, I'm hidin' the evidence better...that peroxide crap was the pits....it was an ugleeeee scene.

The 'mergency vet never called Mumsie back last night...apparently they were busy with sick pets who hadn't eaten feminine protection. Mumsie called our regular vet this mornin' and they haven't called us back either...hmm...the Scruffster doesn't seem to be a priority on anyone's callback list??!!

On the bright side, I'm eatin', drinkin' and pooping...I'm sure you're all excited to hear about that. Frankly, I'm fine...but Mumsie feels soooo horrible for stuffin' peroxide down my throat that she's been fussin' over me and givin' me extra scritchies....we'll see what the vettie sez; should be entertainin'.

It's going to get very cold here on Friday...the high is to be 8 degrees...that's in Fahrenheit...BRRRRRRRRR! Look at us outside this mornin' sittin' in the snow...bit nippy on the butt...

Poor Stan...the icy crust on the snow supported Lac and me...but NOT STAN. He kept fallin' through and it scared him. Finally, he just laid down in the snow and looked pathetic. Mumsie laughed at him and he glared and deliberately walked back to the house in his own tracks...didn't think that big guy was that smart!

Thanks for all ur advice and well wishes...oh, and feminine protection stories...BTW, this isn't my first run in with one of those "things." Someday I might tell you that story...Mumsie's blushin' as I speak.

We'll keep ya updated on the state of my digestive plumbing...

Scruffdude

Pee ess...Lac here...I just had to change the color of the font to PINK...it seemed more appropriate......

Medical Question....?? Please Respond!

OK...Mumsie here temporarily takin' over the blog...

Um...somehow Scruffy found a tampon tonight...Lac was barkin' at him and I tossed a piece of candy at him so he dropped the plastic applicator and the wrapper. No sign of the absorbent part...DID HE EAT IT???? I looked all over the house...checked the garbage...no luck.


I called the emergency vet and got the order to give the poor dog hydrogen perioxide...I WILL ALWAYS HAVE A 5 cc SRYINGE HERE FOR FUTURE BATTLES. "Now Scruffy...would you care to sip this peroxide down?"....we had a huge battle culminating in peroxide covering my floor, walls and shirt. None down Scruffy.

John came home and helped me hold him...2 minutes later he tossed his dinner up...but NO TAMPON. I don't even know if he ate the damn thing...for that matter I have NO IDEA where he got it from...not having needed them for a couple of years...all I can think is one fell out of my daughter's purse over Christmas and he found it today? (When in doubt, blame the kids...)

I'm waiting for the emergency vet to call back...receptionist was thinking they would want to xray him...um...I don't think a tampon would show up on xray, would it?????? Pooooooooor Scruffy....it was totally pathetic and truly disgusting...John refused to photograph it...you may thank him....I would have, but never mind.

Scruffy is very tired now and seems to be exacting his revenge against me by expressing the most noxious smelling farts imaginable...

Has any doggie out there ever swallowed a tampon????

Let me know....

Barkies...er um....

Kissies...

Mumsie

Here We Go, Steelers!!!!! And Joey!!!

Oh Man! Scruff here reportin'....we're still at Butchy and Snickers for an afternoon of sleddin' and a Polar Bear Swim in their pond...but that's another post! We have to interupt for a quick update for the Steeler Nation...WE WON! Butchy and Snicker's had us stay and watch the game by the fire in their warm and toasty house!!!!! We beat the Chargers 35-24 in the AFC Championship.....Seein' this hair on TV made us think of Joe Stains as this is his fav player..... Joe stayed home today to watch the game...think he was a bit nervous....

Look at it...what fur!!!!

When we saw that hair on TV we figured it was Troy Polamalu , but when he turned around....

OMD! Lookie who was playin for him today!

None other than Joe Stains himself!!! He was at Heinz Field playin' for the Steelers!!!!!

WAY TO GO, JOEY!!!!! YOU ROCK, MAN!

Reportin' Barks,

Scruffman

Polar Bear Swimmin'!!!!!!!!!

Now every year on January 1st some crazy Pittsburghers jump into the Mon River and half freeze themselves in the interest of TRADITION. Nutso, huh?

OK dokie...So...the Terriers are startin' our own version of a Polar Bear Swim....as an experienced Lifeguard, I got the pool into position....(Nobody needs to bring up those rumors from last summer that I can't swim....SO NOT TRUE!....)

OHHHHHHHHH...that first plunge in is a bit chilly!!!!!!

Scruffy jumped right in...Stan seems a bit hesitant, the big Dale.

That might be cuz I snarled at him when he had the AUDICITY to grab my lifeguard dress in his stinky Dale teeth and drag me backwards 'cross the driveway. Big Oaf...(Mumsie threated to dump a shovel full of snow on his head like she did this mornin' to Scruffy for poop huntin'...actually that shovel full of snow applied to Scruffy's head was the first time he's EVER dropped one of his coveted stinky prizes...hahahahaha...but I digress...)

This polar bear swim stuff gives a whole new look to makeup and booty care...I sorta have that frozen look, huh????

January Barks!

Laciegirl

Inertia: Mango Style!

Kay...I dunno when Stanley had access to my 'puter, but I'm not 'preciatin' his stoopid header photo and new blog title. His sissy came down to play this weekend, but that's another post...giggle.....

OK...so there was this show on NatGeo last night 'bout dogs in the womb. One of the breeds featured was the Mastiff....I wrote to Mango to inform him that it was going to be on. I also mentioned to him that after seein' the previews that I had learned two things about his breed.

One that he wasn't hatched...and two was that there is actually brain development in Mastiffs. Course that could be for the breed in general...I'm sure there are exceptions to the rule. I mean when I chomped on this Mango car cookie on the ROTE (Runnin' of the Errands...) I absolutely didn't find any brains in it....


Lookie at this NEO POL I TAN Mastiff nursin' her puppers. Hmm...I woulda thought the puppers came in chocolate, vanilla and strawberry, but they all seem to be one flavor. They sorta look like kitties don't they??

Anyway...Stan, Scruffy and I got a bowl of pupcorn and watched the show!!! It was FAB!!! Very informative and the pics were amazing!!!!!

And, we solved the mystery of why Mango is like he is. Yeppers. Evidently, (Lacie speaks in a hushed whisper...) Mastiffs suffer from U TER INE INERTIA!!!!!!!!!

THAT'S WHAT MANGO HAS....UTERINE INERTIA!!!!!

Factually reportin' barks,

Lacie


Pee ess...Scruffy and Stan here....we wannna be like Mango...how can we get one of those UTERINES INERTIA things????????

Oh YUK!

OH GROSS. Mumsie here. How could he...my sophisticated tux wearin' Wire Foxie?? I am NEVER going to speak to him again. He....he....brought a DEAD BIRD into the house and I had to chase him around the kitchen with this little bird foot sticking out of one side of his mouth and some tail feathers out the other. EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.....

I was too grossed out to grab the camera...probably a good thing in retrospect. He ran back outside looking like he wanted to bury it...(oh, please...so did I...) but came back on the patio. I gave him the Pack Leader command "DROP IT!" and he chortled gleefully. I then tossed slices of bread at Stanley...Scruff looked interested. (Apparently, he prefers gluten to feathers...) After tossing several handfuls of whole wheat at Lacie and Stan, Scruffy actually dropped his plumage to hunt bread and I slammed the kitchen door with dead birdie outside.

Now...I am NOT a wimp...but this was disgusting.

Dogs...such ANIMALS.

Mumsie

Curtailed Kissin'!

Scruffy here. I'm postin' today cuz Lacie can't talk. (Woot!) Yeppers, after havin' exclusive dates with Archie, Butchy, Scooter, Opus the Cat, and Noah on New Year's Eve, her lips have swollen even worse than after the Great Lacie Kissoff.

Lookie...even her black lipstick stuff is wearin' off...oh...she's doin' handsignals to tell you girls it's Charcoal Glow if you need the name.....

Babystan and I have been takin' care off her, elevatin' those lips on a couple of pillows and feedin' her lotsa smoothies to keep her comfy. But they're gettin' bigger...sorta like some sorta space creature....

Sunny (she sez she's an experienced RN) came up and is attendin' to Lac. She elevated her head...(we had her head on the floor and her paws on the sofa...) and seems to be givin' her food in addition to the smoothies...we um never thought of that. And she removed the ice we had duct taped to her lips sayin' we almost frostbit her...oopsie.

But she seems to be spendin' most of her time conversin' with Babystan. Lookie at her here laughin' at one of his really stoopid jokes. I never even knew he was funny.

Man...look at that lipstick Sunny slathered on...she said it's called "Inner Poodle"...whatever.

Reportin' Barks,

Scruffman